Group Colonics, Anyone?

I could not make this stuff up. Seriously. If it weren't real, it would be laughable. It is, however, quite real.

I found this topic posted on the Junkfood Science blog (an absolutely fabulous, incredibly sane blog). Evidently, the next season of The Simple Life, socialites Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie are camp counselors at (get this) a weight loss camp.


"We gave the campers enemas," Richie told Reuters Monday in a brief interview given by the pampered pair to promote their show, which returns for a fifth edition May 28 on the cable network E! Entertainment Television.

Merciful Mary Mother of God. I am truly appalled. The camp directors are either ignorant, stupid, money-grubbers, or all three. I can't think of anything more irresponsible. Ditto the show. If I heard one word of this about my child's camp, they would be home as soon as I could take them.

Secondly, enemas do NOT promote weight loss. You lose water. That's it. The loss of fluids can cause dangerous drops in electrolytes and dehydration. This is stuff that kills. This kind of dehydration almost killed me.

But wait! There's more!

"We did it outside, so that was a lot of fun," Richie, 25, said of the enema sequence. "It probably wasn't that fun for [the campers], but it was definitely interesting. It was something that I never thought I would do before."
Camp director Susan Powter says that colonics are the "first step to wellness." Now, here's what is so interesting. Humans, in some form or another, have been around for around a million years. Now maybe chasing antelope didn't leave them with a lot of spare time, but I'm fairly sure that squirting water up their asses was not a part of daily life. If the Cro-Magnon peoples were into colonics, it probably would have been found in their cave paintings.

It wasn't.

Lastly, the show's producer says:

"It's probably a 10-minute sequence, which according to the producer of the show will have you on the floor laughing."
I suppose I'll never know because I, for one, will not be watching.

I will however, award The Simple Life show a Smooshy Faced Cat Award. You have totally earned it. Congratulations to all.

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mary said...

I am as disgusted as you are Carrie! How invasive! Shame on them all!
The Smooshie faced Cat award is far too good for them.
I will never watch such trash and only wish others wouldn't either. It's like watching people eaten by lions only on a different level, that of humiliation without merit. GRRRRRRR


Maybe I'll have the Smooshy faced cat bite them all in the ass.

Eat up, buttercup!


Actually, come to think of it, should any cat hear the words "colonic" or "enema" they'd run for cover!

So maybe the awards *would* have to be scratched.

Le sigh.

mary said...

Maybe the show will be scratched! Swiftly!


Or at least Paris and Nicole. I'm thinking of that scence in Little Miss Sunshine, where Alan Arkin is trynig to teach Abigail Breslin how to growl?

Now we're talking... :)

mary said...

Yep, growling is a much better tool for life. ;)

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I'm a science writer, a jewelry design artist, a bookworm, a complete geek, and mom to a wonderful kitty. I am also recovering from a decade-plus battle with anorexia nervosa. I believe that complete recovery is possible, and that the first step along that path is full nutrition.

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nour·ish: (v); to sustain with food or nutriment; supply with what is necessary for life, health, and growth; to cherish, foster, keep alive; to strengthen, build up, or promote


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