Alternatives to control

Thom Rutledge (the co-author of Jenni Schaefer's "Life Without Ed") has some classic bits of wisdom on his Facebook page that he calls "Thom's Nutshells." I was browsing through them just now and came across this gem that really resonated:

You can give up control of your life but still stay in charge of it.  Like the t-shirt says: shit happens.  Benjamin Franklin said the only two certainties in life were death and taxes; he should have added crappy events, too.  But letting go of control and accepting that shit does, indeed, happen, doesn't mean that you just sit back and be passive.  You can still be in charge of how you respond to all the shit that will inevitably happen.

{{This post has made me wonder whether I really should have dropped my philosophy class in college. Though a large motivation was the fact that the professor reminded me of Shaggy from Scooby-Doo, and I couldn't look at him without snorting or giggling. Neither of which would have boded well for my grade.}}


Charlotte UK said...

I am laughing so hard at the Shaggy reference, that I have quite lost the plot of the blog, but loved it. There are a couple of other "death and taxes" quotes that spring to mind "The first half of your life is ruined by your parents. The second half is ruined by your children" and the other one is too rude to write down here.

Keep on keeping on, my friend. Hang on in there until November.


drstrangelove said...

Control is something I definitely need to work on; this was a great post for me right now. Thanks!

hm said...

Ooooh- nice one. I'm getting 2 mental pictures here.

The first is of a small frail me, hunched over, brows furrowed, lining endless amounts of things up meticulously in perfect little rows. THAT is "control."

The second is a bigger me, shoulders straight, head up, sweeping all those little things off the table and getting ON with life. That is being "in charge."

Anonymous said...

Haha I'm with Charlotte, that's pretty funny!

Gosh, is there any such thing as control? Taking charge is a real option, whereas controlling isn't and it seems that attempting this would lead to endless upsetting situations! But Carrie, you seem to be taking charge with or without the reminder!!!

Katie said...

I like it! That, as a phrase, really sums up how I feel about recovery :) Anorexia made me feel a sort of artificial sense of safety. Recovery is scarier, but the active problem solving I need to do (to replace my previous technique of sticking my fingers in my ears and running away, shouting LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU) makes me feel much more in charge of my life.

I had a biology teacher in upper school who looked like Shaggy too. He'd been there since my mum attended that school, and apparently her friends used to fancy him. I found this very disturbing.

Nobody Girl said...

I love that quote. It's like a wake up call. Thanks for posting it!

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I'm a science writer, a jewelry design artist, a bookworm, a complete geek, and mom to a wonderful kitty. I am also recovering from a decade-plus battle with anorexia nervosa. I believe that complete recovery is possible, and that the first step along that path is full nutrition.

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