tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6561748834204284315.post648412087108800279..comments2024-03-23T08:25:22.526-04:00Comments on ED Bites: Stress, control, and superstitionCarrie Arnoldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02569839838912988783noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6561748834204284315.post-14622582525968226662009-10-27T12:22:01.307-04:002009-10-27T12:22:01.307-04:00My therapist often tells me that the key is to fee...My therapist often tells me that the key is to feel safe within myself, to feel in control naturally. I envy people who are like this. I'm always looking for things outside myself -- grades, food, etc -- to give me a sense of order and predictability. Like you, I hate not being in control. Things like flat tires send me into a ridiculous tizzy. Like you say, I think I fell for the delusions of anorexia hook, line, and sinker. I'm a very cause-and-effect person. I didn't start restricting because I thought it would give me a feeling of power and security. But, once I was restricting, I made the associations -- restricting helped me stay calm. It gave me purpose. I loved the rules and rituals. Looking back, it seems very odd to me. It does seem like a lot of superstition, a lot of "if this, then that." I think I'll always be vulnerable to simple equations like that, whether it's related to food or not.Kimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12524913753671188764noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6561748834204284315.post-78118032513031827952009-10-27T11:55:22.343-04:002009-10-27T11:55:22.343-04:00Thanks for posting about this, Carrie.
I think th...Thanks for posting about this, Carrie.<br /><br />I think that the default human condition is one where we naturally feel "in control". When anyone feels highly stressed and anxious, by definition that person feels out-of-control. For those of us who are lucky enough to not have anxiety issues, those feelings of high anxiety are temporary. We find a solution, or if we can’t find one, we let the problem go and move on. <br /><br />It seems to me that the overly-anxious person feels so much mental discomfort from her unrelenting anxieties that she is unable to cope with them. By definition, she feels out-of-control all or most of the time. The real need, as I see it, is relief from this overwhelming anxiety so that the sufferer can return to the default mode of calmness and feelings of capability.<br /><br />Unfortunately, all hell breaks loose when a predisposed person becomes malnourished, feels temporary calmness, and then seeks to maintain that feeling by continuing to restrict, binge and/or purge, beyond all reason, in an attempt to allay that anxiety. I support bringing an ED sufferer back to full physical health as soon as possible so that rational thought is possible and strategies to deal with life's challenges can be learned.KristineMnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6561748834204284315.post-75690064921581941462009-10-27T04:59:42.702-04:002009-10-27T04:59:42.702-04:00Wow, I can really identify with so much of what yo...Wow, I can really identify with so much of what you write in this particular blog Carrie... Control and ritual have always been central to my eating disorder. When I was severely ill, irrespective of how low my weight was, or how emaciated I looked, I felt utterly compelled to exercise to exhaustion every day and to adhere to a restrictive meal plan - for fear of otherwise having no control. <br /><br />At the height of my anorexia nervosa (5-6 years ago), when the illness had totally consumed me, I can recall pushing myself to continue my morning exercise regime, even though I was experiencing palpitations and had an ED-related, diagnosed heart condition. The fear of 'loss of control' outweighed my fear of dying through pushing my weakened heart in vigorous exercise...<br /><br />Even now, over 30 pounds heavier than my very low weight, I feel I am only able to 'survive' life if my day comprises a series of rituals. In order to recover to the level that I have recovered to date, I have had to swap dangerous diet and exercise rituals for safe, albeit futile rituals. Without rituals, I feel I have no control. I guess I just don't do spontaneity...Cathy (UK)http://www.youtube.com/user/misstiggykinsnoreply@blogger.com